


The New Mission

by chrissy_sky



Category: Gundam Wing
Genre: Asexual Character, Asexual Relationship, Asexuality, Demisexuality, Implied/Referenced Suicide, M/M, Past Child Abuse, Prompt Fill
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2011-02-14
Updated: 2011-02-14
Packaged: 2018-01-25 15:24:23
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 4,138
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/1653395
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/chrissy_sky/pseuds/chrissy_sky
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Heero has a new mission, but this time, he is not alone.</p><p>Prompt: Feb 14 - Gundam Wing, Heero/Quatre: empathy, love - He knew that someone had to keep Heero from self-destructing, psychologically as well as physically.</p>
            </blockquote>





	The New Mission

**Author's Note:**

  * For [RoseThorne](https://archiveofourown.org/users/RoseThorne/gifts).



> The child abuse is strictly of a perfect soldier training level, not sexual. This and the alluding to Heero’s self destruct attempts could still have some triggers, so if you’re sensitive, skip it. The asexuality itself is largely inspired by me reading too much Sherlock BBC fiction. The plot and blatant Buffy reference were given to me by terra_tenshi. Without these, the fic would have been much shorter.
> 
> Betaed by rosethorne (even though it was her prompt).

Heero was in the middle of fixing lunch when he suddenly noticed that his companion was no longer in the kitchen with him. Frowning, he wiped his hands off and went in search of her.

He hadn’t been Doctor J’s only “perfect soldier.” There had been others like him. Failures. He still remembered the way the scraggly faced scientist looked at him when he told of how he had experimented on other children, showing Heero liquid tanks and equipment. There had been pictures too.

“You can’t make something perfect without practice first,” the man had said.

Heero had memorized their faces and names and would remember them later, when the war was done.

Doctor J had expected Heero to either die fighting or kill himself when peace had been accomplished. He had expected a lot of things from his soldier. He really hadn’t expected Heero to get a mind of his own. He could push thoughts of suicide aside as long as there was a mission to focus upon. First he had worked on Wing Zero while watching over the new peace he and his compatriots had fought for. When Dakim had made his first move – kidnapping Relena – he’d been ready.

Now that that incident was over, Heero had begun work on something much closer to his heart. He found the others, Doctor J’s failures, the ones that were still alive. All were broken by their experiences, some more than others. Heero got them to hospitals, if that was the kind of care they needed. Some had been stable enough to be given prescription drugs and small jobs, though not many.

The latest was a Japanese-American named Dru. There was no last name in her records and searches with the girl’s DNA had provided nothing. This wasn’t surprising; J had only picked the ones no one would miss. But Heero felt obligated to search anyway. If there was even a remote chance that any of them had families, he had to try.

Relena would expect nothing less from him than to be thorough.

Dru would need to be hospitalized. Heero was in the middle of searching for a good place for her and convincing her to go. She believed he would be putting her “in a box.” A part of him sympathized. Who was he to say that he was more stable than her? More deserving of freedom?

Heero heard a noise and quickened his steps, entering the lab. They were staying in one of Doctor J’s old hideouts. The memories of the place didn’t seem to bother Dru and it was beneficial to use the dead man’s supply of anti-psychotics to treat Dru until he found her a place to go.

He heard crying and took the next corner at a run, but what he saw surprised him enough to pause and take the scene in.

Dru stood over the crumbled form of someone their age, with bright blond hair. Though he couldn’t see the boy’s face, something in Heero recognized who it was before his brain made the obvious conclusions.

”Quatre?” he asked.

The blond didn’t respond. He was curled in on himself on the floor, still crying. It was the very opposite of how Heero was used to seeing the Sandrock pilot. Though his appearance was fragile, Quatre Winner’s spirit was actually quite strong, his mind clever and agile. He wasn’t in charge of his father’s company for no reason, after all. Heero knew that the Winner Corporation’s stocks were doing well. He wasn’t quite so caught up in his mission that he didn’t keep up with his friends.

Though what troubled him more at the moment wasn’t just Quatre’s emotional state, but how the blond had found him. Heero had purposefully kept everyone in the dark about his actions. Not that he felt any special need to hide it, but it had all seemed far too personal and weighing his options, he just didn’t see the need for backup. There wasn’t any part of his mission that he couldn’t perform himself.

Heero glanced at one of the monitors, but he already knew what he’d find – Quatre hadn’t tripped any of the alarms. He noted as much out loud, mostly to himself, but Dru responded.

“He’s smarter than the average bear.”

Heero snorted softly and bent down to examine the weeping blond. Though Quatre seemed to be in intense pain, he found find no injuries. Nothing seemed broken. Yet the pain on Quatre’s beautiful features was not a lie.

Realization flitted across his brain and Heero grimaced. “Dru, go back in the kitchen. Your lunch is ready.”

She giggled as if he had said something funny – she often did – but obeyed him. Once she was out of the room, Quatre’s tears became sniffles and he was able to sit up.

Heero waited until Quatre could breathe without hiccupping. “Your empathy?” he asked, not condescendingly.

Duo had explained it to him once. Heero didn’t believe in the supernatural, but he was open-minded enough to believe Quatre if he said he could sense other people’s emotions. “But apparently,” Duo had added with a sly look, “his feelings are strongest when they’re about you.”

Heero still didn’t know what to think about that, or about being Quatre’s “Heart of Space.”

Quatre nodded, blushing faintly. He rubbed his head as though he had a headache. “What happened to her?”

Heero fetched some painkillers and water. “What would’ve happened to me if I’d been any less than I am.”

Quatre blinked at him with understanding. “You’re helping her, like the others.”

“Excuse me?”

“That’s how I found you.” Quatre looked a little sheepish. “You haven’t checked in with anyone in sixth months. Relena grew concerned and asked me to help find you.”

Heero helped Quatre up onto a chair, noting how his touch made the blond flush more. “Why you? I would’ve gone with Wufei and Sally Po.” The two were partners with the Preventers now.

Quatre smiled faintly. “Relena was trying to keep the search as much under the radar as possible, in case you didn’t want to be found. Which meant it had to be one of us. Since I have my own resources, she said I was the natural choice.”

Heero nodded, catching on now. Of course Relena knew how to track him down. She had made it her business to follow him, not too long ago. “And you found Doctor J’s other experiments. The other children.”

Quatre nodded. “I haven’t told Relena yet. All she knows is that I’m getting close to finding you.”

“Thank you.” Relena would worry unnecessarily if she knew what he was doing. As the Vice Foreign Minister, she had to focus her mind on other things.

“She’s… broken,” Quatre murmured, motioning in the direction Dru had gone.

“She’s gone through a lot,” Heero responded. He couldn’t give Quatre the details. The blond, also, worried unnecessarily. “I have her on medications until I can find a facility that can help her.”

Quatre’s faint smile grew and part of Heero relaxed at this obvious sign of approval.

But he also still looked tired and Heero decided to take the other former pilot to his room. The room was small, with a tiny foldout bed and a work table against the opposite wall. That was where he kept the pills and his personal laptops, the pills being locked inside the desk. Dru could possibly pick the lock, if she wanted, but Heero had the feeling she just didn’t want to.

“I’m not tired,” Quatre argued as Heero made him sit on the bed.

Heero met his eyes levelly. “Either you rest or I’ll get the sedatives.”

Quatre obediently rested back against the pillows. “You’ve got wonderful bedside manner, Heero.”

Heero shrugged. “I’ve already got to take care of Dru, and I’d rather not see you like that again.” Quatre wasn’t weak. That was why Heero had chosen Quatre to lead the others in his stead while he’d faced Zechs. Quatre had used the Zero System before and could withstand its effects. The fact that he was a brilliant tactician was a bonus.

Quatre’s lips quirked in another small smile. “Okay.”

“So you’ll be leaving as soon as you’re rested.”

“No, I’m not,” Quatre argued calmly. “I’m going to stay and help you.”

Heero frowned. “But your reaction to Dru…”

“I’ll be alright. I can block it, if I concentrate.” Quatre flushed again. “I was so focused on finding you that I left myself open.”

Heero blinked. Quatre applied fight lingo automatically so that he’d understand, at least partially, what he meant. Not having Quatre’s powers, he didn’t have any basis for understanding. “Alright. But one more time, and I’m sending you home.”

“Okay, Heero. I got it.”

Heero left, though Quatre’s smile lingered in his mind. If he had any inclinations in that area, it would have been very hard to just leave the beautiful blond in his bed. Instead, he went to the kitchen, to make sure Dru really had eaten her lunch and not given it to the alley cats again.

-

“Glass man is still here,” Dru said one afternoon, a few days later.

Heero blinked at her, pausing his work at the table, measuring dosages of medication. “Glass man?” Sometimes he forgot Dru was his age. She acted so much younger.

Dru pointed across the room, where Quatre spoke into a mobile phone. Heero heard enough of the murmured conversation to tell that Quatre spoke to his right hand man, Rashid, who was taking care of the business while he was away.

“So fragile,” she added, “so delicate, and everyone sees through him.”

Heero frowned and returned to his work. “He’s stronger than he looks.”

“Not his looks. Inside.”

“He’s gone through a lot too,” Heero confided, though he left out the details. Quatre’s father dying was personal, and it would be hard to explain the Zero System to Dru. The system left a scar on everyone who used it. Heero had seen Zechs only one time since his return and he could still see a faintly haunted look in the Peacecraft’s eyes. No wonder he had disappeared for a year.

Dru giggled. “He loves you.”

At first, Heero only shrugged. “He loves everyone. His heart is too open.” Not a negative statement; it was merely a statement of fact. Heero knew it was that quality that made Quatre, Duo, and Relena all better equipped for handling life after war. But being open like that could still get them hurt even during peacetime.

“No, silly,” she almost sang. “He loves you.”

Heero stilled as the meaning sunk in. It didn’t occur to him that Dru was just making it up. Even at her most random, she had still gone through the same training as he, and her babbling had some logical sense. If sometimes she would look up at the ceiling and claim she saw the stars, even though they were inside the base, which was in a satellite colony, then it only seemed strange because he didn’t understand what she meant.

Quatre having feelings for him could be troublesome. He would have to deal with it.

-

It wasn’t that he felt nothing for Quatre. Heero felt a fondness for all the pilots, and he and Quatre had shared hard times together. When Heero had nearly killed the scientists, it had been Quatre who stopped him. They had traveled back to Earth together; Heero still suffering the aftereffects of using the Zero System for the first time, Quatre mourning for his father and clinging fiercely to the hope that he hadn’t killed Trowa. It had kept them together for a time, before Sanq fell and they went their separate ways.

It wasn’t even that he hadn’t had sex before. He had. That was the problem. It just wasn’t that interesting. All the sweat and other bodily fluids. But it wouldn’t be easy to explain.

Or so he thought.

“You’re asexual,” Quatre said calmly as they fixed dinner together, the blond dicing tomatoes as if he hadn’t grown up the pampered Winner heir. “Duo told me.”

Heero frowned. “Is there anything he doesn’t talk about?” he grumbled irritably, remembering the things Duo had told him about Quatre.

“Hm?”

“Nothing.” Heero held in a sigh of irritation. “I just don’t want you to be hurt.”

Quatre raised one pale eyebrow. “Heero, I didn’t come here to seduce you. I’m here to help. As a friend.”

“But you love me.”

Quatre flushed and focused back on the vegetables. “Yeah. But I’m not here expecting things you don’t want to give me. I just wanted to make sure you were alright. That you hadn’t hurt yourself.”

Not entirely out of the realm of possibility, Heero had to admit. “It’s not that I don’t feel anything for you,” he murmured. “I just have no interest in sex.”

Quatre blinked at him, confused, before his blush renewed. “Oh?”

Heero wondered why his heart was beating so fast. “So if you can live with that… I would appreciate having something to focus on. I’ll eventually run out of missions and then the temptation to follow through with Doctor J’s plans for me will reemerge.”

Quatre reached across the island and touched his hand with small, calloused fingers. “You’re not going to try to kill yourself. Promise me.”

Heero nodded agreeably. “I’ll try.”

Quatre smiled. “Then your terms are agreeable.” He giggled as if his own words amused him. “I never did believe sex was the most important part of a relationship.”

Something inside Heero fluttered pleasingly at that. He knew there would still be some problems. Quatre might even grow to change his mind. But for now, it was enough.

-

Heero found that he really liked holding Quatre while they slept. The easiest position to hold him in was Quatre’s back against his front. The blond claimed this was called spooning, which Heero thought was a silly name. It definitely did not feel silly to do it, though.

It did cause some previously foreseen problems. Quatre would try not to disturb him, but Heero was a light sleeper at the best of times. In the morning, Quatre would wake aroused and slip as quietly as he could into the shower. He never said a word when he came out, but the blond would be flushed and smiling as he leaned down for a morning kiss. Heero gave this willingly, a silent apology for not being normal.

Heero quite liked kissing too. It seemed strange at first, but Quatre was good at it and Heero quickly warmed to the activity. He felt sometimes he could do it for hours, a single-minded activity that cleared his mind and kept him from thinking of anything else, for awhile. If only he didn’t have to be disturbed by Quatre inevitably becoming aroused or Dru walking in.

Heero’s arrangement with Quatre seemed to make Dru happy. She would giggle and tease them both, dancing around them like a child half her age. She and Quatre both began to respond better to each other as well. Quatre’s empathy effected him less with Dru’s inner pain, and the girl spoke less of being put into a box. (Though she was still inclined to say strange things, which Heero was still the best person to understand. That was another reason why placing her was taking so long. How could he leave Dru with people who would just dismiss her strangeness as crazy?

If only Sally Po were still a full time military doctor. She was truly the best equipped for dealing with the kind of trauma Dru had, as she was the only doctor aside from J to really examine Heero.)

Heero tried not to stress about this apparent failure. Being with Quatre made that easier, his presence somehow lessening the strain by simply being, but it didn’t fade completely. He just wanted what was best for Dru.

In a lot of ways, it was beyond merely cleaning up Doctor J’s mess or having a mission to focus on. He wanted to fight for these children. They had been left behind, mistreated, and forced to fend for themselves. Heero knew that many more had died after J abandoned them than during the training process.

He wanted to help them, fight for them, because there had been no one to do it for him. He had faced every test, every experiment, every new drug, the little girl and her dog, all alone.

The bed creaked as Quatre turned to face him. “You’re tense.”

Heero sighed. “I’m just a little frustrated. This is taking longer than expected.”

Quatre quirked a pale eyebrow, amused. “You gave yourself a time table, didn’t you?” It wasn’t a question.

Heero smiled faintly. “Naturally.”

“Oh, my dear. Sometimes these things just can’t be predicted. But don’t throw in the towel just yet. If it takes longer, then it just does.” Quatre tilted his head up, kissing Heero’s brow in a feather light touch. “And you’re not alone.”

No, he wasn’t. It was a true relief, not because he couldn't do this on his own, but for some reason he couldn't describe. Heero tilted his face, seeking for and capturing those soft lips. He pulled Quatre’s smaller body close, intent on thinking of nothing but the Sandrock pilot for awhile.

He was just getting relaxed when Quatre began to squirm away from him, flushed and smiling.

“Sorry,” he said, looking bashful as he started to get out of bed. “Just need a second to calm down.”

Heero glanced down—ah. A telltale bulge. He sighed; this was getting irritating. He began to dislike anything that kept dragging Quatre away from him, but what he disliked wasn’t anything to do with Quatre. The blond couldn’t help his body’s reaction, and he was only trying to respect Heero’s wishes.

No, what Heero was irritated with was himself.

Not giving his lover any warnings, he pushed him back onto the bed and pulled his pajama bottoms down.

Quatre gasped. “Heero!”

“Shh,” Heero murmured as he knelt between Quatre’s legs. Doing some quick calculations, he opened his mouth and took the head of the blond’s length inside.

Quatre gasped and squirmed delightfully at his actions, all the praise Heero needed. Hands tangled in his hair, but they didn’t get in the way so the former Wing pilot allowed it.

Quatre was soft, Heero analyzed as he tentatively used his tongue, figuring out what the blond liked. Uncircumcised and clean. There was soon a salty taste that joined with the taste of skin; pre-ejaculate. Heero swallowed it down, making Quatre squirm more, thrusting up into his mouth.

Quatre was an appropriate size for his overall frame and Heero had no trouble relaxing his throat and sinking further down, taking him in completely. Holding his breath was also easy; just another part of J’s delightful training, holding his breath for long periods.

It went according to plan until Quatre climaxed nearly five minutes before Heero’s own estimation. He swallowed the fluid anyway, finding the taste really wasn’t that bad. Either Quatre was different than his previous lovers or Heero cared about him, and thus didn’t mind.

He lifted his head, wiping his mouth of the back of his hand. “Did I do something wrong?” Heero would admit that he hadn’t known completely what he was doing, so had expected some mistakes. He’d had the common sense not to bite down at least. “You came faster than I expected.”

Quatre blushed and smiled. “Normally that’s a sign that it was very good, Heero. No, it was wonderful. It’s just been awhile, and we’ve been together for a few weeks, so it kind of built up inside…” He trialed off, looking very embarrassed.

This wouldn’t do. Heero lay down beside him for another embrace. “Don’t worry. I’m just glad you’re pleased.”

“You really didn’t have to,” Quatre said, meeting his eyes again as he cuddled close. His soft blue eyes sparkled with happiness and content, which pleased Heero further. “You know that, right?”

Heero nodded. “I really didn’t mind. It’s not a pleasant as kissing, but there is a certain level of excitement to being the cause of your pleasure.” He suspected that, fairly soon, he might like to try having sex with Quatre. Even something as simple as oral sex felt different with him. Sex might too. Maybe they could both enjoy it. He would bring it up later, and hopefully Quatre would like to work on it with him.

“Thank you,” Quatre leaned in for another kiss, and if he tasted his seed on Heero’s tongue, he didn’t say anything.

“Thanks probably isn’t necessary in this situation.”

Quatre giggled. “Maybe.”

Heero sighed, pressing his cheek against silky blond hair. “Now if only Sally were still practicing medicine. Then life would be approaching perfection.”

“Sally?”

“Yeah. If anyone could handle Dru, it would be her.”

“Why?” Quatre pressed, an intent look on his face.

Heero shrugged the shoulder that Quatre wasn’t leaning on. “She’s the only doctor aside from the scientists to really study my case. All our cases, actually, but she met me first.”

Quatre lifted his head, looking surprised. “Heero, you did know that she’s in charge of the Preventers’ medical facility on Earth, right? It was one of the previsions that Une had to provide for her services as an agent. All of the staff were trained specifically by Sally and when not on missions, she still oversees much of the work.”

“I didn’t know that,” Heero admitted, feeling a bit foolish. Earth hospitals had been considered, of course, but he’d neglected the fact that sometimes the easiest answer was the most obvious one.

Quatre smiled warmly. “We’ll give her a call in the morning. And, my love, next time? Ask for help.”

“Could say the same to you,” Heero grumbled, his fingers finding one of the blond’s ticklish spots and attacking mercilessly.

Quatre squirmed wonderfully against him, laughing helplessly, and Heero watched, realizing he was content for the first time. He liked it too.

-

Dru seemed to trust Heero’s approval and, after contacting her, Sally Po flew personally to the L1 colony to meet the girl. It was hard, but he left the two women alone during their first meetings, Quatre’s hand on his helping to dampen his protective urges.

“You’re like a father whose daughter is just starting school,” Quatre murmured.

Heero glanced at him, but there was no change in Quatre’s expression. Quatre never spoke of his father or of the guilt that Heero suspected he still carried over the man’s death. The words didn’t seem to trigger anything, however, so Heero let it slide.

They went with Sally and Dru back to Earth, to see that their charge was settled in safely. Dru’s room had been prepared before her arrival. It was too large for an ordinary hospital room, though the Preventer hospital was far from ordinary, having been built to Sally’s exact specifications. The walls were painted a light blue, with patterns of puffy white clouds on the ceiling. Heero understood the imagery immediately – Dru would sleep under a real sky that she had been deprived of for so long.

There were also toys and complicated video games to hold the girl’s attention when she had no sessions. Even the bed was far from ordinary hospital issue.

Heero soon understood how this had come about when Relena walked into the room. She wore a pristine lady’s suit and a smug expression.

“Sally told me what Dru liked,” said Heero’s first true friend. There was relief in her gaze. “I’m glad to see she likes it.”

Heero glanced over at Dru—she was already playing one of the games. “Looks that way. Listen, Relena—”

She held up a finger, forestalling his apology. “I’m used to you running off by now, Prince Charming. However, you do owe me.”

Heero looked back over at the television. Quatre sat beside Dru as she explained the game to him, playing simultaneously. The blond noticed him looking and smiled warmly.

“Yes. I do, Relena. Thank you.”

Relena looked startled by that, but she too glanced at Quatre and her expression softened. Somehow, she understood him, as she had always been able to. “Oh, Heero.”

Heero cleared his throat and tried not to blush, which surprised him because very little gave him the urge to blush. All the teddy bears in the world weren’t going to keep her from embarrassing him about this. That knowledge was what caused the blush, though he couldn’t really explain why Relena knowing, and teasing him, made him want to blush. Perhaps it was merely because she was the closest thing he had to family, apart from Quatre.

He knew Quatre was worth it though.


End file.
